While giving a presentation to a group of sales representatives, I noticed their phones seemed to have a magnetic effect on their hands. Some seemed to be taking notes on their computers—but I had no way to tell if they were memorializing my brilliant ideas or catching up on their emails. I was speaking to them, ironically, about communication. They were genuinely interested in my topic, but they found it hard to concentrate. They were a distracted audience.

Distraction is here to stay. Research shows that people distract themselves every few seconds. Whether they are daydreaming or feeling the urge to grab their phone, they are not fully in the moment. The universal presence of smartphones and tablets provides an endless supply of diversions, ranging from emails to articles to that old standby, Candy Crush. Gone are the days when, as in the Lincoln-Douglas political debates in 1858, the audience sat attentively for hours while each speaker presented his case. Now we are lucky to get someone to go 10 minutes without looking at their phone. So how can we capture the audience before they pick up their device?

Classic Ideas for Capturing Focus

Plan your speeches to anticipate audience distractibility and use these tips to increase the likelihood that your audience will pay attention.

Put your main point first. People are paying the most attention at the beginning of your message. Start with a hook that grabs their attention, such as a question, statistic, anecdote, or quotation. Then deliver the main message within the first two minutes to ensure it is received. Don’t start with history or background. Cut to the chase.

Use clear, simple language. If you simplify your speech to a primary school level, people will find you easier to understand. Even if you know that all your listeners are college grads, if you speak at a secondary-grade level (e.g., 12th grade), they are likely to disengage.

Language level is a combination of sentence length and vocabulary. Vary the length and rhythm of your sentences but keep your average length low. Use short, familiar words in place of vocabulary that you think will make you sound smart. Instead of utilize, say use. Instead of taking it under consideration, say considering. Don’t say prior to; instead, say before.

How Can We Retain Our Audience’s Attention?

Even if you’ve prepared a knockout speech, your listeners are likely to feel twinges of distraction. Given the atmosphere we live in, how can we retain our audience’s attention?

First, realize that people pay attention to what they find valuable. Your audience will make a snap judgment when you begin speaking, deciding whether your material will benefit them. Demonstrate unequivocally that listening to you is the best thing they will do all day.

Even after you have won your audience members’ attention, you will have to work to keep them engaged. Marianne Fleischer, speechwriter and presentation skills coach at Fleischer Communication, has decades of experience helping presenters lasso the wandering listener. She points out that most people have an “automatic guessing machine”—they believe they know what you are going to say, so they don’t have to listen to you. She suggests that speakers disrupt this automatic process. Here are a few ways to re-engage your listeners.

• Ask a big question. Challenge your listeners by asking them a riveting question such as, “Why do you think we’re here today?” or “What do you think is the biggest cause of business failures in our society today?” Get them talking and let them share a bit of their own experience—they will then be more likely to listen to you.
• Tell a killer anecdote tailored to the audience: Always have two great, targeted anecdotes ready to go in case you need to bring back a distracted crowd.
• Change something. If you’re standing up, sit down. If you’re sitting, pop up from your chair. Walk around the room. Walk to the other side of the podium. Say something funny. Surprise them.

These tips will help you keep your listeners on their toes. When they don’t know whether you’re about to pop a question or call on them, they will be more alert.

Speaking to an Online Audience

The tips listed above will help you create powerful presentations, but challenges linger when speaking online. For example, it’s frustrating when people keep their cameras turned off. Speaking to a sea of black boxes does not inspire great performance.

If many people in your audience have turned off their video, point out that it is more respectful to other group members if people turn on their cameras. If you are a manager or instructor, you can say that having the camera on is required. When I present online writing training, I always call on people without cameras to answer questions first.

People pay attention to what they find valuable.

When people work on multiple screens as you speak, it’s tough to keep their attention. Multitasking is rampant despite research showing that it ultimately makes people less productive. People feel more productive when they are juggling six balls in the air, and they may be unwilling to let their other work wait while they listen to you. If I see someone looking down at their phone or at another screen, I call on them, asking them to answer a question or comment on something I have just said. We need to keep bringing them back to our presentation.

By accepting that some people are bound to be distracted during your presentation and preparing to deal with distractions, you will find it easier to keep your cool when someone in your audience pulls their phone out of their pocket and starts scrolling while you’re speaking. Provide solid value, put verve in your voice, and keep the audience on its toes: You’ll win back your listeners’ attention.

Click here to read more articles on writing and speaking to a distracted audience.

5 Ways to Cut Through the Noise and Write to Distracted Readers

4 Ways to Build Relationships With Language

Cultivating Authenticity as a Speaker

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The managing director of a large wealth management company recently complained to me that his staff seemed unable to forge warm relationships with the firm’s clients. “They are reluctant to pick up the phone or invite the client to lunch,” he lamented. “Even their emails veer between formal and stilted or breezy and inappropriately casual.” Recognizing the need for improvement, the firm hired me to work with them, and soon, their team showed a greater awareness of practicing the language of connection.

Effective verbal or written communication is crucial for building strong relationships in the workplace. When we write at work, we aim to engage our readers and achieve a specific purpose, such as gaining approval, obtaining information, or fostering collaboration. However, if readers feel that you do not care about or understand them or that you have disregarded social norms they value, their minds may close. Then, you will fight an uphill battle to get your point across.

Here are four ways to build rapport and inspire greater loyalty and satisfaction in your readers.

1. Spell their names correctly

I was coaching a senior accountant at a regional accounting firm, helping him compose a proposal for a prospective client who was leaving their current firm. “Did you ask them why they are changing service providers?” I inquired. “Yes,” he replied. “They said that the other firm consistently spelled their name wrong.”

Losing the client was a blow to the original firm, yet they lost the business through a simple error.

Most of us want our names handled correctly. More important, remember that people generalize. In this case, the client concluded that their accountants did not know or value them, neglected to proofread, and were careless about details. These conclusions led them to jump ship.

Be especially careful about using the right form, particularly if a person’s name is commonly spelled several ways, such as Stephen/Steven, Alan/Allen/Allan, or Kelsy/Kelsey.

2. Open with a comment that shows you know who they are

Open by making a pleasant comment that falls within professional boundaries. For example, if they mentioned in your last conversation that they were taking a cruise, write, “I hope you had a great time on your cruise.” If they recently had a child, say you hope the parent is getting enough sleep.

Let the reader know that you are not simply using them for business purposes. The more the reader feels seen and understood through your opening comment, the more open-minded they will be to your message.

3. Use personal pronouns such as I, you, and we

Business writers often default to fall into using the third-person pronouns rather than using the more colloquial and humanizing tone of the first-person, second-person, and first-person plural pronouns.

Writing “The firm has changed its policies” sounds formal and cold. “We have changed our policies” sounds like you are taking responsibility for the change. Similarly, “Clients are urged to change their passwords regularly,” sounds stuffy. Instead, you could write, “We recommend that you change your password regularly,” which sounds like friendly advice.

4. Match your reader’s tone

Be aware of your readers’ age, educational background, job role, and English proficiency, and write with words that suit the individual reader. Avoid starting emails with “Hey,” which many people find maddening. However, if they always address their emails to you with “Hey,” you can match their style.

If writing to a non-native English speaker, avoid idioms. “We’ll have to tear the Band Aid off” is meaningless to a foreigner. Similarly, saying “It’s raining cats and dogs” conjures confusing images.

Instead, use clear and direct language that is easy for all readers to understand, regardless of their cultural background.

These are just a few examples of ways to build bridges with your colleagues and clients when you write to them. Of course, the best way to connect with other people is to actually care about them, and show them with your language.

Click here to read more articles on Building Relationships with Language

The Art of Conciseness: 5 Ways to Master Brevity

The Language Of Leadership

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Think about some of the most successful leaders you’ve known—perhaps a boss, a teacher, a Club President, or a committee chair. Chances are they share some common traits. As you develop your leadership skills, it’s helpful to reflect on leaders whom you have most respected, and try to verbalize what made them so impactful.

During my many years working as a consultant for business communications, I’ve found three characteristics that nearly all strong leaders share: a sense of integrity, the ability to respond to feedback, and strong communication skills.

Integrity

Successful leaders show integrity in all their actions, meaning they behave consistently with their values and take responsibility when things go wrong. This kind of integrity leads naturally to authenticity, which makes people feel that when the leader speaks, they reflect their true thoughts and values within the boundaries of professional presentation. Having integrity shows up in other behaviors too, such as being on time for meetings and not interrupting others.

Ability to Receive Feedback

Effective leaders welcome input from other people in the organization. They show a willingness to receive feedback by asking open-ended questions such as, “How do you feel about what I’m saying?” or “Can you tell me more about that?” and using inclusive language that incorporates “we” and “I.” If there’s a disagreement, they don’t get upset or dismiss the person’s observations. A good leader will pause and try to assess what their team members are trying to convey, perhaps by saying, “Let me be sure I understand you. What I think you said is ‘XYZ.’ Is that right?” or “Can you help me understand that better?”

Strong Communication Skills

Perhaps the most crucial trait of a good leader is that they are able to get people to listen when they speak. Strong communicators use clear language to ensure everyone understands the message, and they avoid trite buzzwords and jargon.

Ivan Rosenberg, Ph.D., who has trained over 4,500 leaders in his leadership development workshops, says, “A leader creates the possibility of a future that wasn’t going to happen and enrolls others into taking action to fulfill that future.” In other words, strong leaders create a concept of a future outcome and draw people toward it through their example and their language. It isn’t just the verbal part of communication that makes a difference, the nonverbal part is just as important. Rosenberg emphasizes that leaders’ behavior sets the tone for the whole organization. If leaders make excuses when they make mistakes, they create a company of cover-ups. If they are always late, others assume it’s okay to be late, too.

Verbal Behavior of a Leader: What Do You Say?

As you develop your leadership skills, the most impactful tool you can use is your words. Your words matter, and that includes not only what you say but how you say it.

If you’re trying to connect with a new team, ask questions or play appropriate games to figure out what the interests and strengths of your team members are. Try ice breaker activities to learn more about people’s experience and ways of communicating. Another effective strategy is to use storytelling to bring people together. This is particularly useful if you have stories that align with the goal of the team or can describe a challenging situation that ultimately led to a successful outcome.

Successful leaders behave consistently with their values and take responsibility when things go wrong.

Jargon and buzzwords, such as “low-hanging fruit” and “thinking outside the box,” can lead to confusion or a sense of not belonging for people who don’t know the terms. You will win more confidence using clear and straightforward language than spouting the latest business jargon. The same rule applies to acronyms: Be sure to identify them the first time you use them. For example, don’t describe the program year and refer to the “DCP.” Explain the Distinguished Club Program so new members can understand it, then introduce the acronym.

How you say your words can be just as important as what you say. When you are addressing a group—even during a simple get-to-know-you session—speak clearly and audibly, pronounce your words clearly. If you are in a diverse group, avoid using local dialects that may not translate to your entire team.

Vocal tone is key. To project a sense of leadership, your tone should be strong. A hesitant tone implies uncertainty or lack of confidence. End declarative sentences by pitching your voice downward at the end of each sentence. Treating statements as if they were questions leads to a damaging speaking habit called “upspeak.” People practicing upspeak seem to be asking for the listener’s approval with every sentence. For many listeners, this habit is distracting, even annoying. Drop the last syllable; do not inflect upward.

Your vocal tone says volumes about your feelings. Imagine all the ways that a person could answer “fine” to the question of how they are feeling. Someone might brightly say, “Fine!” and you’ll know they’re having a good day. Another might say “Fine” curtly and you instantly know that they are not fine at all. If you struggle with people misconstruing your words, try listening to recordings of yourself speaking or asking for feedback from your Toastmasters network.

Physical Presence: Looking the Part

Verbal communication is only one aspect of the language of leadership. When you stand in front of people, your audience or team is making snap judgments about your competence, professionalism, and credibility before you even open your mouth. These judgments happen instantaneously, usually at a subconscious level. Your posture, clothing, facial expression, gestures, and other factors must present a consistent sense of leadership.

A leader’s physical presentation should be consistent with the culture and values of their organization; for example, Mark Zuckerberg, CEO of Meta, is well known for wearing hoodies to major meetings. However, those hoodies are of excellent quality, clean, and fit him well. When he was called to testify before U.S. Congress, Zuckerberg donned a suit—demonstrating that he knows how to dress appropriately for his environment and is able to adapt as a leader.

Your physical appearance can be empowering or disempowering. To project an image of power, stand up straight, but don’t be rigid. Keep your hands open at your sides unless you are gesturing naturally. Be sure to smile at your audience—sometimes it helps to choose a friendly face in the audience and smile at them. Make your smile genuine, however; plastering a grin on your face will make everyone wonder what you’re hiding. That said, you need to understand the situation and circumstances in which you’re speaking. If you’re addressing something serious, such as a bereavement, disaster, or impending layoffs, a smile would be inappropriate. The secret is to read the room and respond authentically.

Movement is another powerful tool for leaders. Move intentionally. If you stride across the stage, do so in order to speak to both sides of the room—not because you’re feeling antsy. As you move, keep your hands loose at your sides.

Eye contact is another key for connecting with people. In large groups, scan the room and focus on just a few individuals. Then, scan again, noting whether people are still paying attention or have started surreptitiously staring at their phones. If you feel you are losing the audience, change your physical position—stand up if you are sitting down or vice versa. Take a quick poll. Ask a question. Jolt them out of their apathy. In smaller groups, look at individuals with a friendly expression, smiling authentically when the occasion suits.

To retain a strong presence, avoid fidgeting, keeping a stiff posture or facial expression, or playing with your hair, jewelry, or clothing. If you ask others to share their thoughts but then stand with your arms crossed and a stern expression, your listeners are likely to clam up. Whenever your body language contradicts your words, people will believe your body language.

If you feel that maintaining a straight, open posture is uncomfortable—and many beginning speakers feel this way—try practicing in front of a mirror or at your Toastmasters club. Most people are not born knowing how to present themselves professionally. It’s a learned skill, and Toastmasters is an ideal place to practice and master various techniques.

Dealing With Sensitive Issues

If you’re wondering how best to speak to team members under challenging circumstances, remember three words: professional, friendly, and respectful. If you include those three factors in your communication, you won’t go wrong. For example, suppose a team member is upset that they did not receive an expected promotion. You can listen actively and empathetically, showing you comprehend their frustration. Encourage open dialogue, letting the person express their feelings and thoughts. Respect their sentiments.

You can then calmly explain some factors that went into management’s decision without disclosing confidential information. Then, you can respectfully offer to work with the person to create a career development plan that might lead to future promotions.

This approach—listening, reflecting the other person’s message, explaining the situation, and looking toward the future—will help you deal with a wide range of potentially distressing issues.

Developing the language of leadership requires self-awareness. Be mindful of your strengths and weaknesses. Work to improve yourself. As the Toastmasters year gets off to a start, integrate this knowledge into every speech, meeting role, and club officer interaction. By consistently maintaining the personal, physical, and verbal qualities of a leader, you will discover that the language of leadership becomes natural—because you are becoming a leader.

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