Communication is hard enough without sabotaging ourselves by using intrusive words and phrases. Certain terms are guaranteed to raise our readers’ hackles — so why do we use them? Maybe we’re not thinking hard enough about how our message is coming across to the people who receive it.
Herewith (is that one of the words to avoid?) is a brief list of words and phrases that I recommend you erase from your vocabulary.
Unfortunately
A customer-service manager wrote to a client, “Unfortunately, we do not offer that service, so we are unable to help you.” What a downer! Why not say, “We do not offer that service, but we can offer you something similar,” or “We would be glad to refer you to someone who provides that service, as we do not offer it.”
Until you call the situation unfortunate, your reader might accept it with equanimity. However, once you label a circumstance as painful, your reader is forced to agree with you.
Occasionally, unfortunately is the right word, because some events really are unfortunate. But think carefully before you say so.
If you don’t mind
“If you don’t mind, I’d like to move this appointment to Thursday.” This annoying phrase usually precedes a request that the listener or reader might resist. What if I do mind? By saying, “If you don’t mind,” the speaker or writer has co-opted the other person’s ability to protest. Rather than presuming that the person doesn’t mind, why not (gasp) ask them if they care. “Can we move this appointment to Thursday?” is more straightforward and respectful.
As I just said
This phrase fails the “You Idiot!” communication rule. This rule states that if you could read your message aloud and naturally add, “You idiot!,” you should not send it. We have all received “you idiot” emails, and we didn’t need to have the words y-o-u i-d-i-o-t spelled out to know we were being dissed.
Can’t you hear the “you idiot” in “As I just said”? As I just said, if you had been listening, you idiot, you would know what I just said.
Do you like it when people use this phrase when addressing you? I thought not. So please don’t say it to others.
To tell you the truth
I fired a mechanic for using this phrase. My engine was making a funny noise, and the mechanic and I took it for a test drive. He diagnosed a couple of problems, and when we returned to his shop, he said, “To tell you the truth, I think it’s the alternator.” I immediately thought, “Was everything else you told me a lie?” I was confused about what was true and what was false.
Saying or writing “to tell the truth” calls the integrity of everything else you said into question. Instead, write “frankly.”
To tell you the truth, I wanted to share some of the most scritch-scratchy phrases in American English. As I just said, they are power thieves, stealing impact from your language. If you don’t mind, I suggest you stop using them.
To learn more about Worktalk’s business writing training, contact Liz Danziger at lizd@worktalk.com.
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